Dude we pulled into this gas station in a town just off the interstate as our second stop in Missouri (after a fabulous Fazoli’s detour) and a mother ducking fight breaks out between some people at the gas station pumps.

I won.

Kidding.

As I started the refueling process on one side of the island, I see another guy working to keep his dog handled on the other side of the island. Doesn’t seem too weird but I guess him and the dog just got out of the car. Maybe the dog had to use the bathroom or something or was just being a dog wanted to run around?

VP went into the store but comes back to get her mask and sees a dude running up with no shirt on at the next set of pumps. She thinks it’s sketchy AF. 

I look up and see one dude pissed and punching the face of another dude who is backpedaling and smiling his ass off while taking shots to the face. POW POW dude is still smiling and drops his shirt. It’s ducking crazy town. I swear they’re all friends, too. Someone drove by the main road and started honking cause the one-way fight had spilled out into the street. 

There’s apparently a chick in the driver’s seat of the car next to us (with dog dude?) and for some reason she starts hauling ass around the gas pumps in her car and I hear yelling and scuffling. As she’s driving around, she’s yelling that she’s called the cops and I didn’t notice but VP saw that yelling lady had no underwear on “she had her hoo ha hanging out.”

Dude stops punching and goes back to his car and everyone is yelling and he’s trying to leave but is beyond livid (sup SAT words) but shirtless-get-punched-in-the-face-guy-wants-more-punches is talking shit still so he goes back and keeps trying to hit him. 

The dude that got punched is still laughing and walking in toward the gas station. Puncher dude is getting back in his car and freaking pissed and speaking of…I had to go so we went in the store and hey, nobody wearing masks over here inside the store. 

But there’s video slots so that’s cool

From inside the store I see homeboy with the dog running past the gas station, shirtless-punched-in-the-face-guy starts taking off to go with his alleged buddy while also sagging and sprinting. Puncher dude takes off in his car and I don’t see where homegirl in the car goes.

We leave immediately after taking advantage of the facilities and as we get out to the car, there are a few pairs of underwear on their side of the pumps!

We get up to the campsite HUZZAH! and we tell my homeboy Jeff the story (omitting the location) and the first thing he says is “was it in St. James?”

YES!!!!!!